Tag Archive - creative writing

8. just because your life isn’t cool on Instagram, doesn’t mean it isn’t cool. [twenty truths]

July 15, 2012 in 20-something troubles, creative fiction, lessons learned, my story, stories with 5 Comments

Twenty-Something Truths For Twenty-Somethings 

truth number [8] today from the blog series hosted by myself and my dear friend Kristin! please join the conversation as we continue to unpack our twenties, and the truths we have found thus far. what have you learned? <3 <3 <3

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Just because your life isn’t cool on Instagram or Twitter, it does not mean that it isn’t cool.

There is a huge difference between living a full and adventurous life, and telling everyone about your full and adventurous life. Our twenty-something culture has given us some very creative mediums to tell everyone about our full and adventurous lives. I’ll be the first to admit that I’ve never claimed to be a ‘photog.’ I would never put it in my bio, I won’t ever offer to give someone high quality portraits, because that just isn’t my gift. But Instagram has this ability to make me feel like I am meeting the world’s deep need to see everything about my life.

Now, some people have an eye for photography and enough time in their day to take #nofilter pictures of their every move. They get tons of followers and double taps, and it makes their life seem so incredibly awesome because everyone can see how incredibly awesome it is. They make my portfolio look like a disposable camera’s product. In the perfect black & white picture, they have conquered my confidence in the visual portrayal of my own life. And I proceed to believe my life isn’t cool, because I didn’t use that filter on my martini picture, or get enough likes on the candid one of my puppy.

Or, the Twitter cool kids with their six-figure-amount-of-followers, who give the most hilarious synopsis of their day in 140 characters. I need to beat them, I need to be wittier than them, I need to hashtag like them. Or I need as many people to care about my thoughts as they have caring about theirs. I need everyone in the world to know my hilarious or thought-provoking or life-changing sentences. And when I don’t beat them, I proceed to believe my life isn’t cool.

But your life is not measured by likes or retweets or picture quality; your life is measured by breadth and depth and joy and love. I can’t tell you how many times I have admired a friend’s life from afar (and by ‘afar’, I mean ‘frequent drive-by’s on Facebook’) and then later found out that her marriage is actually at a really low place right now, or he got fired from his job, or those two have completely lost touch with their identity. We can make our lives look phenomenal — that’s the best-kept secret of 2012. We can play the part of anyone — and yet be completely empty in and of ourselves.

So put down your smartphone, and let it be. Stop caring about her endless list of comments, or the fact that he always eats at trendy cafes; focus on the people in your life who make up for all the pictures you can’t take fast enough. They deserve your attention more than any timeline does. And if you’ve chosen well, they likely base their friendship with you off things far more important than pictures and tweets.

6. your mind’s purpose. [twenty truths]

July 13, 2012 in 20-something troubles, comedic relief, lessons learned, my story, stories with 4 Comments

Twenty-Something Truths For Twenty-Somethings 

truth number [6] today from the blog series hosted by myself and my dear friend Kristin! please join the conversation as we continue to unpack our twenties, and the truths we have found thus far. what have you learned? <3 <3 <3

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Your mind is meant for more than sleeping and reality television.

 

I am going to be honest: this is really hard for me to write.

One of my favorite ways to relax is to put in a movie and fall asleep on my LoveSac in the middle of the afternoon. And as much as I make fun of reality television shows, I am currently knee-deep in my sixth consecutive season of The Bachelor/Bachelorette (and maybe I cried when Sean left. What was she THINKING.).

But here’s the thing.

A recent study showed that for every hour of TV that you watch, you shave 22 minutes off your life. The average American spends 2.8 hours per day watching TV. That’s a lot of minutes being shaved off my life. That’s a lot of wasted brain space.

We get addicted to the latest and greatest being done by everyone on TV — reality shows or otherwise. We are caught up in everyone else’s story that I’m scared we’re missing out on our own. I’m scared I’m missing out on my own story.

We are smart, capable creatures. We have been given the ability to think, speak, dance, share, and give. There is art to be created, books to be written, countries to explore. We have lived long enough to know that we can be and do and see more if we think hard and stick with it.

Success should not be measured by anything more than the difference you are making in your world as you find that which makes you come alive. Spending endless weekends wrapped up in what the Kardashians are doing is fabulous – if you are a Kardashian. Be interested in your own reality TV show – make it interesting.

4. the timeline of your life. [twenty truths]

July 11, 2012 in 20-something troubles, comedic relief, lessons learned, my story, stories with 6 Comments

Twenty-Something Truths For Twenty-Somethings 

truth number [4] today from the blog series hosted by myself and my dear friend Kristin! please join the conversation as we continue to unpack our twenties, and the truths we have found thus far. what have you learned? <3 <3 <3

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The timeline of your life will be starkly different than that of your parents.

My mom was 21 when she got married, three weeks away from turning 22. Three weeks before I turned 22, I was sitting on my bed watching Netflix TV shows back to back, taking a break only to make another batch of Ramen noodles. I lived in a tiny house with 3 other girls, and my bed was a $50 mattress on the floor of my room. I was so far beyond not-ready-for-marriage, my only context of relationships was in the FRIENDS re-runs i used as background noise for my endless crafting projects.

I have already had more jobs in 5 years than my dad has had in thirty. I can’t exactly sit still, and I can’t stop living my life in semesters, though I graduated college more than 3 years ago. I’m still learning what I want to be when I grow up, and I don’t exactly see an answer to that one quite yet. I’m a doer, a mover, a shaker. My energy level is always ridiculous, and I usually have four different careers planned out before lunch.

I was born when my mom was my current age. The idea of shoving seven pounds through my ladylands makes me want to hurl, and the thought of being entrusted with a child is just plain silly. I can barely manage to feed myself, let alone train A PERSON on how to live in the world.

My parents owned their first home when I (their firstborn) was still an infant. I currently live in a college dorm, and I only know a fraction about home-owning. And yes, it’s all thanks to shows on HGTV.

Women were just barely scratching the surface by the time my parents graduated high school. Expectations were just barely beginning to change for women, and so many hundreds of females were fighting for my current-day freedoms and opportunities. I have options today that our foremothers did not. There’s still a lot of progress to be seen, but man alive — we have come a long way.

 

My point: times have changed, and that’s okay. There are different expectations, and that’s okay. Your life is different than your parent’s, and that’s okay. It’s crucial to stop comparing yourself to the generation before you. (They didn’t even have Netflix or cell phones or Facebook. Clearly we’re better off.) If your relationship with your parents involves them constantly pushing their expectations onto you, gently sit them down and tell them you are making choices that are the best for YOU, not for THEM. They’re adults; they can handle a good heart-to-heart. Or if they freely support whatever it is that you choose to do, write them a thank you note for being so stinkin’ awesome.

Live according to your passions and truths. Sure, your parents made you, raised you, etc. But that doesn’t always mean they truly know you. Best advice: let them get to know you. Show them your passions and truths. Chances are, they’ll be just as stoked as you are.

2. embrace the in-between feeling. [twenty truths]

July 9, 2012 in 20-something troubles, lessons learned, stories with 2 Comments

Twenty-Something Truths For Twenty-Somethings 

truth number [2] today from the blog series hosted by myself and my dear friend Kristin! please join the conversation as we continue to unpack our twenties, and the truths we have found thus far. what have you learned so far? <3 <3 <3

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That “in between” feeling you have? It means you want something out of life. One day you will miss the time when you actually wanted something out of life.

 

There is wandering and there is floundering. There is taking a longer time to grow up, and choosing to stay a child. There is making sacrifices in order to achieve a dream, and there is settling for less than you thought you wanted.

There’s a smoothie and there’s juice.

A smoothie is juice + pulp and rind and skin. A smoothie contains things that are nourishing, but it is crowded with things that have no nutritional value. You get so filled with the extra stuff, that you miss out on the things that actually matter.

Juice is juice + nothing. Juice is the raw, pure, unadulterated nutritional goodness that your body needs to feel alive. There’s no extra weight in there; it’s 100% truth.

There is a vast difference between all of these things. And in that difference, in that in-between, lies a zest and zeal to squeeze all the value out of life, throwing away the pulp. You were designed to feel this awkward because it drives you to find life.

So, embrace the awkward. Keep tapping into you thirst for more, for different, for better. Drink the entirety of life, and don’t allow anything (or anyone!) to crowd the space you have designated for enjoyment. Don’t miss out the nutrition because of all the extra.

hindsight is bliss [what a girl needs to hear]

March 29, 2012 in dating, jesus, lessons learned with 2 Comments

today’s sweet post is a letter from Olivia. don’t we all wish we could read letters from our future selves at least once or twice? this is a precious, precious post. i hope it blesses you like it did me!  show Olivia some love. <3
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[about the author] Olivia Erickson is a highschool-college hybrid who has extreme passion for many things, including mentoring junior high girls and good coffee. She writes, tweets, and tells visual stories. Someday, she will travel the country in a vintage trailer with a pet hedgehog in tow, in an attempt to find untold stories – but for now, she’s just trying to stay warm and sane during long Minnesotan winters.
~~~

Dear Little Liv,
You sat there with your feet dangling out your open window on a warm May night and you cried to yourself, wishing for a man to throw pebbles and sweep you off your feet. You were almost twelve. I wish that the one night could have been the only night you cried in your loneliness, but it wasn’t. There will be many more nights to come.
There will be nights of loneliness – of deep heart aches and longings for boys to notice you and for life just to hurry up so you can find a man. There will be nights of regret – of giving your heart slowly, over time to boys where you realize that things are suddenly complicated and you just lost a friend. There will be nights of deep pondering – of questioning intentions and feelings when you’re not sure if you like the attention or are terrified of it. There will be many tears, many racing thoughts, and many desperate prayers.
It sounds daunting, but there are also brilliant days ahead. There will be days of comfort – of realizing that the men in your life are a blessing. There will be days of confidence – of knowing that you did the right thing in a friendship with a boy and seeing the positive results. There will be days of laughter – of getting to be the little sister to the boys around and having their respect. There will be many brilliant days that will in time make up for the tearful nights.
At some point, you will sit with friends as they tell you with regret in their eyes their stories of boys that broke their hearts and you will be so glad that a relationship never formed with that boy that you were swooning over. At some point, you will hear shallow girls complain about how there are no good guys and you will be so thankful that you’ve been the type of girl that makes friend easily with really fantastic guys, even if that means not dating any of them. At some point, you will see not being allowed to date as the biggest blessing of your teen years.
It’s going to come. It’s going to be fulfilling. It’s going to blow you away. It’s going to be worth it. I promise you.
I have hindsight and what a marvelous thing it is! You wont be perfect and life wont be perfect. You are going to think that you are awful and just made the hugest mistake of your life, but in the end, you’re going to come out of junior high and the first three years of high school with very little boy baggage. There will be two amazing young men who will cause you to get angry because they will each accidentally steal a bit of your heart at the wrong time, but God heals that in the end and you’ll learn a plethora of lessons.
So hang in there. It’s only the beginning. Every single tear that you shed will be turned to gold and redeemed.
You will be strong. You will be loved. You will be satisfied.

creative writing. [oh, how i miss thee.]

March 6, 2011 in 20-something troubles, creative fiction, dating, stories with 0 Comments

a paper from my creative writing class in college. i so miss learning.

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prompt: secret love

two old friends get together for dinner after a long time apart. one of them is secretly in love with the other one. show this, don’t tell it.

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i got here early. of course. i’ve been to this cafe a thousand times, but i still wanted to get here early. i get to airports at least three hours early because i’m excited by the idea of going somewhere new; this is no different. and it’s not just the new dinner menu that i’m excited about.

i’m wearing yellow. i know, i know. at first i was wearing that grey sweater with the pink stripes. then i put on the blue dress. but my last minute decision to get a spray tan did not turn out to be a good call so i opted out of the bare-legs choice. i think i changed my shirt approximately 16 more times before settling on yellow. you like yellow on me. i think.

my shoes turned out to be a different story. black flats then grey boots, but will that make me too tall? so then back to black flats but then maybe brown goes better because then i can wear gold jewelry. but i use my hands when i talk a lot, especially when i’m nervous, so maybe gold jewelry isn’t the best of all ideas. i surveyed my entire outfit countless more times, squeezing my love handles, cursing the four cookies i ate last night on impulse. somewhere in there i started breathing again. that helped. i also remembered that you never really cared what i wore, so maybe it doesn’t really matter all that much. except it matters to me. my excitement makes it matter. and so i am wearing yellow. and i got here early.

your hair is long again, i see. i think i recognized your hair before i even recognized your face. it was long when we first met, too. the way you play with it while you speak reminds me of that saturday we spent at the coffee shop, studying and laughing and drinking chai lattes because you liked to say the word “chai”. i can’t even focus on your questions because i keep laughing inside of myself remembering how you say “chai” and remembering your hair, how it was then. how it’s the same today. it’s just a little more silver now. i notice, but i’d never say that. i know you would probably still be self conscious about that.

yes, yes things have been good. years, i know…it’s been years. well there was the job, then the boredom, then the “dreams: realized” moment, and then the new job. oh and the dog and the huge tax return and the new house. yes, yes i love owning a house. oh, thanks, i guess i decided to go blonde when the big tax return came…yes, yes yes, laugh, laugh laugh. my brothers are doing fine, thank you. and my parents are fine, too, yes…still in denver. yes, i definitely remember that trip! ha…some things never change.

your eyes look tired. i mean, they still sparkle. they’re bright blue for God’s sake, of course they still sparkle. but there is tired behind them. or underneath them. and there’s a touch of silver in them, just like your hair.

i order the salmon and the veggies. and a glass of savignon blanc. yes, i still am a health freak. and a wino. you order a hamburger. plain. i guess you are still a picky eater. i think we even fought about that once. it’s funny to think about the things that pissed us off when we were younger. when you’re 17, everything is the biggest deal in the world.

i shift my fork nervously on the table cloth. over, then under, back, then forth. i make sure to drink two sips of water for every one sip of savignon blanc. no one likes a trashy drunk at dinnertime. i think you’ve had two beers at this point. maybe three. i hope you don’t start to get too…friendly. i never could resist when you started to get too friendly. your fingers are tracing the edge of your glass. the condensation glistens your palms, so you start to trace that too. you have great hands. and arms. i like that space on the inside of your elbow. as if you heard me, you start tracing that space, too. i can almost feel the tracing on my own arm, but we’re not touching at all. maybe when we hug goodbye, i will trace my fingers on your arm. wow, i don’t even want to say goodbye. i wish –

–what? oh, yes, sorry…i don’t think i’ll be going international again for a few months. it’s great work, but i’m trying to let the organization send new people. you would? where have you been in the last few years? any more trips to africa?

i’ve always loved the way you tell stories. you’re long-winded in the best way, and descriptive in your vernacular. i love your enthusiasm; your passion is still as alive as the day i met you. you talk and talk about the things that make your heart beat and i just sip wine, sip sip water, sip wine, sip sip water. and my eyes follow your fingers and the waitress gives up all hope on us ever leaving and the hours pass like minutes.

when i was in college, my favorite movie was “my best friend’s wedding.” i love julia roberts because she has an impossibly beautiful smile and she really makes you believe that she is who she says she is. she loves her best friend in this movie that i like so much. but as the title suggests, she attends his wedding as a guest, not a bride. there is a scene when they are on a boat and there is a line where he says, “when you love someone, you say so. when you feel it, in the moment. before that moment passes you by. because you never know when you’re going to get that moment back.”

no, no i’m not really seeing anyone. oh, stop it, that’s very kind of you. it is, it’s very funny how things pan out. your glass is empty, but you keep tracing the edge. it is simply mesmerizing. almost enough to keep me quiet–

–no, no thank you ma’am. i don’t need another glass of wine. i sip my water and swallow the cool drink, along with my courage.

you give the woman your card, insisting i let you pay. you always have kindness written on your heart, and your generosity is overwhelming. i am flattered to still be treated like a woman. when you excuse yourself to use the restroom, i am left to mentally beat myself up. my mind is filled with “should have”s, and then your phone starts to ring. “cassandra is calling.” it says. and next to that appears a picture of you kissing her. on your wedding day.

i look around; most of the tables are empty by now. the bartender is counting tips and the manager is dangling keys. i stand up. there is no way i can look at you again. the space between this table and my car feels just shy of ten thousand miles, but that’s okay. i’ve walked further before. and i’ll walk it again.